Overwhelmed

I blame it all on pregnancy hormones. You know how every emotion you feel is multiplied, ten fold. The only word that comes to mind each time is overwhelmed! In some ways it's a beautiful thing, and possibly even a gift. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for the Lord. I feel so richly blessed and feel so undeserving, too. I am so happy to be living here, and that we're all healthy, that I haven't thrown up in a whole week, Kenny has a great job, my kids are awesome and as cute as can be, and on top of it all we're getting another little baby to bless our lives. Often times at the end of the day, before Kenny and I fall asleep we talk about Tyler and Brynlee, and how much we love them. We laugh at things they did or said, and it's amazing to think we get to do this all over again, and love another little child just as much. I guess I didn't expect to be this excited, since it's our third. I think I expected the excitement to wear off after the first or second, but we are just as thrilled! Along those lines, I feel overwhelmed with love for my little family. When Kenny calls at the end of the day to let me know he's on his way home, I am so excited to talk to him and tear up at how happy he makes me. I love him more deeply lately, and I'm so grateful for how much he does for me and for our family. Me crying, or tearing up happens all too many times during the day. Tyler will say something sweet, or Brynlee will just smile and laugh or snuggle up to me, and I feel as though my heart will burst. (Pregnancy makes me somewhat emotionally unstable, obviously!)

But of course, there's opposition in all things. And with these added emotions of love and gratitude, I also have lots of extra stress and anxiety and get overwhelmed all too easily over the simplest things. I've had many small moments of "oh my gosh why I am I pregnant!? I can't even handle the two I've got!" Cooking and cleaning seem like huge ordeals. If I do well one day I am proud of myself, until I wake up the next morning and realize I have to do it again. Then I feel like crawling back into bed and not getting up haha. Not every day, but you know. So this is my overwhelmingly weird post. By the way, I am almost 7 weeks along, due roughly December 3rd. I haven't been to the doctor yet, so that might all change.