Adorably Dramatic

Why do I blog in spurts? I don't know. Maybe it's because I think of things to blog about and they build up in my head, and then have to overload once I finally sit down to blog. Or maybe it's just because we've been taking a billion pictures a day, having so much fun with our new camera, and although I haven't edited a single one, I am going to share some of them. In any case, here goes my 3rd post of the day.

Brynlee has the cutest little cry. Not her really mad and angry, "I'm in pain" kind of a cry. Just the dramatic "I'm hungry and letting you know it's no fun" sort of a cry. I quickly snapped these within 30 seconds or so the other day when she had just waken up and couldn't believe I hadn't started feeding her already.

Thoughts on nursing

1. Why does it have to be that every time someone wants to come over, or a FedEx man needs me to sign on a package, or I need to go somewhere, that you can guarantee I will be breast-feeding!! I guess it's inevitable since it consumes most of my day (and night). But I hate it. I will be so glad when she doesn't eat as often, and even eats cereals and baby foods and stuff. Because then it won't matter if we have to stop mid-feeding. It doesn't take me extra time to cover anything up. I don't know about all of you nursing mothers but I get pretty stressed out by it some days. I feel pretty confined like I can't go anywhere for longer than 2 hours because I need to feed her, and I don't like doing it anywhere but in privacy, like my own home. Or church is ok because there's at least a mother's room and I can come and go as I please. Something I'll have to figure out or get over if I'm going to continue having children.

2. I think it's very rude of whoever thought up the big scheme to make it so babies are so sensitive to everything we eat. I will take the losing sleep, and a loss of freedom with my time and where I go. But please, please don't take away my food. I need my chocolate, my dairy indulging, my mexican foods, and just the simple peace of mind that I can eat what I want. Ah well! All sacrifices of love I guess.

3. I have decided to be more productive with my nursing time. I now read conference talks or listen to them, read books, etc. No more spider solitaire. (I was getting really good at it by the way.)

4. I am so glad that breast-feeding is free. That's one of the biggest perks.

5. I hate not getting enough sleep because it makes me more impatient and stuff and I feel bad about that. But I will admit that most of the time it's really not so bad. It's nice to have some peaceful one-on-one time, even if it's in the middle of the night. It's a great time to get little revelations on things. I get to think about things a lot more, and just bask in little Brynlee's sweet spirit. I love my girl.

XXL

Tyler has always been a big kid. But ever since Brynlee was born, he seems to have grown exponentially. He went from being large to extra extra large, comparatively speaking. It's not totally his fault, I guess. After all he's forced to measure up against his tiny little sister. Really though, he's huge next to her.

Most noticeable in diaper changing!!

Size 6 vs. newborn (now size 1) is a BIG deal. Sorry, no picture of her cute diaper bum...yet.

A Mother Heart

Remember this talk by Sister Beck? I was listening to it yesterday, and again this morning because it inspires me so much. Makes me want to be a better mom and person. I also have fallen in love with one of the scriptures she quotes. Alma 64:33 "Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great." It has never meant so much to me as it does now. Weary is exactly how I've been feeling lately. And, it's not anything huge I have to do every day. Being a mother is a million small things. But it helps me keep it in perspective, that all these small things day after day will eventually result in something great. Just thought I'd share.

Old habits die hard

I am 22 years old, and I still bite my nails. I know, it's shameful. One of the more embarrassing, but true, facts about myself. It's not just every once in a while, I mean like I have never once used nail clippers on my fingernails. I never see have any white part of my nail, and I NEVER paint my nails because I have never wanted to draw attention to my hands. I have tried several times in the past to stop, but never could do it. But this time, it's for real. I AM STOPPING! This is why I am publicly announcing it on the world wide web. It somehow makes me more accountable. I want to be able to give Kenny nice back-scratches because he loves them. And I want to not be so ashamed of my ugly hands. But most importantly, I want to do it to prove to myself that I can. It will take a lot of self control. I have been doing well the past few days, and can even see some white on most of my fingers. When I have fully grown them out, I will reward myself with a manicure, and post a picture of my success. And succeed I will. Just you wait. Wish me luck.

Boots and boxing gloves

On any given day at our house you may find Tyler sporting around these babies...


Grandma bought them for him one day while we were in the hospital. He loves his "ruff boots with pots" (dog boots with spots). And although they are techincally rain boots, he says he does not want to get them wet. This boy LOVES shoes.

And you will definitely be able to see Brynlee wearing these little hand covers. It's an every-day must to protect her perfect face from those wicked nails! My dad says they look like boxing gloves. And her boxer name is Princess.

The Birthday Celebration

Monday night we FINALLY celebrated Tyler's 2 year birthday. I wasn't up for doing a big fat party with lots of little kids. So we just invited my family over and I made some cute animal cupcakes (I cheated and bought the royal icing animals). We had lots of balloons all over the house cuz Ty loves them and it's only been 24 hours but I'm ready to pop them all hah. We had a good time though. It was fun to watch him get so excited to open all his presents and eat the cupcakes and ice cream. He hated that he had to wait all afternoon for everyone to come over before he could rip off that wrapping paper. I even had to move the presents up to our high table so that he couldn't reach them. I feel much better now though, having finally given him a little party. Happy Birthday big guy--I love you.

On Sunday my youngest sister, who is 12, asked me when my stomach was going to deflate. I would love if it would just "deflate". Maybe I'll go get a big pin and pop it.

Tyler loves Brynlee so much. He doesn't like that she sleeps so much though. He is always yelling, "Baby, wake up!"

Today Brynlee had yet another doctor's appointment. Good news--no more jaundice! Not a problem anymore. Also, she weighs 7 pounds, 7 ounces now! She lost 6 ounces originally, so she was down to 6 lbs. 14 oz. but now she's surpassed her birthweight at 8 days old, and that makes me feel good as a mom. It's no surprise with how much this girl eats! She's still got nothin on her brother. He gained 2 pounds in the first 2 weeks of life. He hasn't stopped since :). While we're on the subject of weight, Tyler weighed in at 31 pounds the other day. Or maybe 32. And I am weighing in at...haha did you really think I'd tell you?! It's still way too much, that's all I know. Anyway. We still had to go to the lab today and get her heel poked (or should I say stabbed) yet again for the 2nd screening. Lots of stupid circles to fill up with blood. And LOTS of screaming. Tore my heart out.

Brynlee Week 1

So This Is Love

Dinner:
Dessert:

Movie:

Happy Valentine's Day to you and yours!!

Update

I seem to be having a hard time getting to the computer lately. And even though right now I'd rather be sleeping since we just got both of the kids down, I want to catch up so that I don't forget the events of our first few days adjusting to being a family of four.

First let me say that delivering the baby is only the beginning. It doesn't take long for the after-birth pains, or whatever they're called, to kick in and it was like labor round 2. Zero fun sir. Thank goodness for pain meds. On top of that, is waiting for the stitches to heal. This has been much better experience than last time though. The hormone changes and frequent crying episodes are fun for not just me, but everyone that's around me too, I'm sure. And we can't forget about every nursing mother's favorite visitor, the milkman. He came with a special delivery for me a couple nights ago. Boy did he deliver! To add to these lovely things, my ankles and legs have joined forces; I now have my own set of fat, swollen cankles! I never swell during pregnancies, and I didn't have edema after delivering Tyler, so this is all very new to me. I hate it. And of course, the no-sleep thing is something I don't think I'll ever get used to. Ok, I'm done complaining about everything because in all reality, this time around everything has been SOO much better. I have felt a thousand times better ever since I delivered Brynlee, than I did in recovering from Tyler. For that, I am very grateful.

Tyler has gotten really sick since we came home from the hospital. He had a cold before, then got a cough and it was getting worse. Thursday I had to take Brynlee into the pediatrician to get her jaundice checked out (a whole other story) and I asked him if he would just listen to Tyler's cough while we were there because it sounded like it was in his chest. He did listen to it, and he said it was fine and just needed to run it's course. Then just started checking other things out and found an ear infection! Little did I know! So we got an antibiotic luckily. But that night he got a really high fever and threw up and was just sicker than a dog. He would just lay on the floor and moan for a while. It was the saddest thing ever. Luckily he's doing better today, but it was stressing me out a lot. I do NOT want him to get Brynlee sick, or me since I have to take care of both of them. We're praying that we can both stay healthy with him around. I feel extra bad because he really wants to hold Brynlee all the time and is so fascinated with this baby and just loves her so much. It's really hard to keep telling him no he can't hold her, or touch her, or breathe around her for that matter. I keep telling him it's because he's sick, and that as soon as he's better he can play with her all the time. I hope he understands.

Brynlee is doing well, but as I mentioned before has a little case of jandice. In the hospital they kept her under the bili lights and would just bring her to me every 3 hours, for no longer than 30 minutes, to nurse her. I hated it. We had to go to the pediatrician, as I mentioned earlier, the morning after we got home from the hospital. Then he had me take her over to the lab and so they could cut her heel again and draw some blood to test her bili levels. She screamed a lot. I swear it took like 5 whole minutes. Apparently her blood wasn't coming very quickly so he sat there squeezing every last drop out of her poor little foot. She was so upset, and so was I. We have to go back in to both the doctor and the lab again tomorrow. I really hope she gets better soon. Other than that, she is just the most beautiful little girl I've ever seen and every time I look at her, I can't believe she's mine.

Happy Birthday Tyler

2 years ago today you came into this world and changed our lives forever. I became a mother when you were born and you have helped me learn and grow so much. You're my big helper, and my best little buddy. I know you're having a really lame birthday, and that you don't even know it's your birthday today because we just got home from the hospital and we want to do a better job of celebrating it. I know you don't care because you don't even understand what a birthday is, but believe me tears have been shed over this because I feel like a bad mom for not doing your birthday right. Hopefully by the time you read this and know what we've done, you'll find it in your heart to forgive me. :) I love you so much, Tyler. Thank you for bringing so much happiness into my life every single day. I'm so lucky to be your mom.

(This was written on his birthday, February 11th. Sorry for the delay in posting.)

Brynlee Day 1

Our Beautiful Baby Brynlee

Brynlee Weston was born Monday, February 9, 2009 at 12:10 p.m. She weighed 7 pounds, 4 ounces, and was 20 inches long. She has light brown hair and she is perfect. I know you're all wanting more pictures, but deal with that for now because they're all on my mom's camera.

Sunday night we dropped Tyler off at my parent's house and he stayed the night there so that we didn't have to wake him up so early the next day. Monday morning at 4:30, Kenny and I got up and got ready. He gave me a beautiful priesthood blessing and we left for the hospital. Before we even got in I took his face in my hands and said, "This is the truth: I love you more than anything and I am so grateful that we are having this baby. Anything I say in the next 24 hours that's contradictory to that, I will not be held accountable for." :)

They were a little slow getting all the paperwork and everything completed so I didn't get pitocin started until about 7:15 a.m. The contractions got going pretty quickly and everything went very well. My doctor came in and broke my water an hour or two later (I really don't know when) and things picked up even more. I had decided before even going in that I wasn't going to get an epidural. This baby was going to be DRUG FREE! (minus the pitocin.) The contractions were a little harder, I think, because of the pitocin, but Kenny pulled me through everything and was my strength.

Thankfully this labor was SO much faster than Tyler's. 5 hours, start to finish. Obviously the pit is to be thanked for that. I didn't want to do it anymore by the end. I've really never been through anything so painful in my entire life, and there's nothing to compare it to. Kenny's beautiful hazel eyes kept me going. He had so much faith in me. His big hands wrapped around mine, letting me squeeze them as hard as I needed to. He put up with a lot. I even hit him once. (He is insisting that I tell this story because he thinks it's so funny). I don't know what he said but I was in the middle of a really hard contraction and he must have said something I didn't like because I hit him in the chest. Like a side-punch kind of a thing. I immediately started crying and apologizing over and over because I felt so bad. I was pretty much a wreck. But he talked me through everything and kept me relatively calm (there was screaming by the end, when I was pushing.) Everyone said to let my mind escape to somewhere else so as to not think about the pain. I would always escape back to our honeymoon and remember as we swam around snorkeling in the beautiful water at Coco Cay, holding hands. And walking along the warm beach together without a care in the world.

I didn't have to push for very long. I don't even think more than 5 minutes. It was so incredible to feel her descend down and be an active part of all of it, compared to when I had the epidural with Tyler. I wasn't able to resist the urges to push, so she came out quickly and I tore, and I felt it. But the relief when she was finally here was so amazing. It was such a beautiful feeling. She started crying and they handed her to me and she was perfect and right then, everything was worth it. She knew me immediately. She stopped crying for a minute and just looked at me. I was so overwhelmed, and so at peace.

Within an hour of being born she was nursing wonderfully and Kenny and I were just enjoying oohing and aahing over her and how gorgeous and perfect she is. We didn't decide on her name, Brynlee, until after she was born. But we love it, and it suits her. Tyler is so cute with her and says her name so adorably. He's still learning how to be soft and gentle with her. We feel so blessed to have two beautiful and healthy children. More pictures to come later.

I can smell the sunscreen

Why is it that Tyler naps during the most beautiful time of day? I get so anxious for him to wake up so I can take him to the park or just go outside next to our building and kick his soccer ball around (something we've been doing a lot of lately). It's hard, on days like today, to not just go jump in the pool. It's still a bit too cold for that. Meaning, it's only about 75 degrees today, and you better believe I turned the AC on. First time since we've been here, but I'm sick of sweating. I told Kenny he can talk to me about saving money on our power bill when he's 9 months pregnant. But oh! To walk by the pool every day that's here in our complex, it makes me crave summers so bad and takes me back to my years growing up here in Houston when we pretty much lived at the pool. Tyler loves the pool, too. We go on walks, per his request, just for the sole purpose of seeing the "wata". He lays down very carefully next to the pool and splashes his hand in the water, just to feel it; poor kid can't help himself.

I've been doing A LOT of walking lately to get this baby here. I randomly run up and down the stairs, too. Anything I can think of really. Still no baby. I think the only thing it's doing is hurting me, ha. But she still has until 5:30 Monday morning until I go in to be induced. I haven't lost all hope in her. Come on baby, you can do it. I'm so excited for my sister, Steph to come. She gets here on Monday, which is great timing!

For those of you curious about my sweet camera, check it out here. I know, it's way too fancy for me. He did get a good deal on it though. Now I've really gotta figure out photoshop and everything to make it all worth it. I love it though, and I can't wait till it comes in the mail.

Thank You Will!

I'm normal once again. You're awesome.

Help!

I made the mistake of trying to change my blog all by myself (something I've been wanting to do for about a year now!) and I finally changed the background but now the text is all off-centered and my titles are still orange! I am SO retarded when it comes to computers. Somebody please help me fix this.

Spoiled Rotten

Today I turned 22 years old. Wow. I like that I'm getting older.

I got spoiled bad today! But first let me tell you about my awful dream that woke me up feeling depressed and heart-broken! I had a dream that I was shaving my legs (that's the first clue you KNOW this is a dream...anyone that's been 9 months pregnant before can tell why) and Kenny was trying to tell me that he had cheated on me. I didn't even know what to say, I just kept crying and crying. I was asking who it was and just cried some more. It was the worst dream I've ever had. He laughed when I told him because I had "cheating dreams" when I was pregnant with Tyler, too. Must be my subconscious insecurities about looking like an elephant manifesting themselves in my sleep again. It really was bad, though.

Back to my awesome birthday day. I got up with Kenny and made omelets as he got ready for work. They weren't so bad, either. Ham, swiss cheese, avocados and tomatoes. Then I kissed him goodbye and wished that he could stay and spend the day with me instead. Oh, and he surprised me with some chocolates before he left. I got ready for the day and then got Ty ready and fed once he woke up. My mom came and picked up Tyler before 9, and gave me some birthday money and told me to enjoy my day :). Have I ever mentioned how awesome my mom is?

I did a lot of shopping. Shopping for myself, shopping for Ty's birthday that's in exactly one week and I'm afraid I won't get around to it once the baby comes (any day now, right?). I also bought a double stroller which we will need. I treated myself to lunch at Sonic, took a nap, finished "quilting" (my crappy version of it anyway) and binding my hearts table runner, and it looks awesome! Kenny came home from work and took me to Olive Garden for dinner. Oh, and he gave me a diaper genie (hallelujah!), and new shoes and earrings (that I picked out of course). But that's not even all. I have a SUPER nice and fancy pantsy camera coming in the mail.

I was having some serious Tyler withdrawals so we hurried home from dinner, grabbed the chocolate dream dessert that I had made and went over to share it with my family, and retrieve my son, who didn't seem to miss me at all. My mom also had cupcakes and ice cream ready! They sang, we partied, and now we're home and I'm feeling slightly guilty about the fact that I have consumed more calories today than I should in an entire week. But not too guilty.

Told ya I'm spoiled. Spoiled rotten. Happy 22nd birthday to me.

Let's Face It

I just don't have babies early. I just don't. My kids take their due date way too seriously.

I did go to my appt. yesterday, and she did strip my membranes...or at least she tried to. Apparently I have an incredibly long cervix (how's that for way too much personal information?) and she said she wasn't able to do much as hard as she tried. All that pain, and for nothing. I was, needless to say, a little bummed afterward. Tyler wasn't very early. He was born the day before his due date, and even then it was at like 10:40 that night. So anyway, I have an induction scheduled for the morning she's due. Maybe that will get her butt in gear and make her want to come on her own. But I'm not getting my hopes up.

Ya know how some recipes it's not an exact science, you just take it out of the oven when it looks right, or smells good? Well that's how some people have babies. But my instructions said 40 weeks, and they will not be done until then. So keep cooking little one, and you just come when you're good and ready. I will enjoy my birthday tomorrow, still pregnant. But hey, at least I can say I was 22 when I had you.

Happy Groundhog Day

What in the world happened to January? I can't believe how fast that went.

Today is such a beautiful day. For as much as people complain about the summers here--and with good reason because they are almost unbearable--it's pretty fair because we get to play all "winter" long.

My baby shower the other night went very well. It was so sweet of Brooke to do that for me. She had Kenny write a letter to our daughter and they read it out loud at the shower. It was so sweet and made me so excited to watch him be a daddy to a girl. He's pretty rough and tough with Tyler so it will be fun to watch how he interacts with his little girl.

It was a little bit awkward when I would receive a gift and they would have to tell me who they are...but so nice of everyone to make me feel so welcome into the ward. The most common phrase I heard at church yesterday was, "still no baby, huh". Obviously.

I know I really shouldn't post that picture, but there you have it. I have been having contractions off and on for the past few days, and I was dilated to a 2 1/2 last Tuesday. I'm going in for an appointment in an hour and she will strip my membranes today and hopefully get this baby on the go. I know I'm impatient because she's really not due for another 7 days. But who wants to wait if they don't need to? By the way, she caught up on growing. Whether it was how she was turned or what, I don't know. But she is measuring just fine now.

Yesterday we spent some time with 2 of Kenny's buddies from work and their families. We had such a good time! It was fun to meet the guys Kenny messes around with all day at work. They all started there recently and have a good time together. Their wives and kids are so nice, too. Tyler loved playing with them.

Hopefully my next post will be showing off my daughter :). Wish me luck.